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[aut_nihil]

Pope doesn't go on as many missions as he once did. But he sees trouble brewing in the future, in the solo orders Carver was given, and he can't stomach staying behind when Carver might face the worst alone.

So he defies his own orders and he goes with Carver.

And things go sideways. They're outnumbered despite his best efforts and his warnings, and they're gathered up, hoods on their heads, arms tied behind their backs.

Carver's strong though. They're going to make it through this. He's going to get them through this.

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[aut_nihil]

Pope Strauss there, hand on Carver's shoulder, hating everything.

"Go guard the door," he tells Washington, who is reluctant to leave but obeys.

[fortitudosalutis]

Something is really wrong. Riley rocks Carver, holding him close and rubbing his back, trying to soothe a man who's so rarely rattled. But Carver's shivering, feverish, and he sounds scared. Whatever they did to him -

It was bad, Riley thinks. It was really fucking bad.

He meets Pope's gaze, wary, but he doesn't let go of Carver. "C'mon," he murmurs. "Try and eat, okay? We've got painkillers for you."

Don't fight, Riley prays. Don't fight, just take the goddamn pills.

Carver makes a small sound, almost a sob, but he nods.

[aut_nihil]

Pope steps aside so Shaw can deliver the meds. He limps over to the MRE he made and brings it to Carver.

"Eat," he orders.

[fortitudosalutis]

Carver feels like he's on the verge of crying for no goddamn reason. Hiding his face against Riley's chest, his skin crawling at the thought of being touched but unwilling to pull away. He doesn't want a doctor. He thinks he'll die if anyone tries to take his clothes off.

But he leans against Riley and he takes the MRE, eating listlessly. Riley holds him, stroking his hair.

"I don't need a doctor," Carver murmurs, almost pleading. "Nothing happened."

[aut_nihil]

"Relax, son. I won't let anything happen to you." He leans against the wall, feeling sick and cold and too hot at the same time.

He resents Anders being here, seeing them like this.

[fortitudosalutis]

Riley holds him, stroking his hair, and then eventually passes Carver two pain pills. He swallows them mechanically, wincing at the sour taste. Trying not to look at Pope, feeling sick.

“I don’t…” Carver closes his eyes tight. “Don’t hold me down,” he whispers.

“Brandon…” Riley murmurs, sounding almost frightened.

[aut_nihil]

"No one's going to hold you down. I won't let them. But I need you to be strong, Carver. We need to get through this."

Leave, he think fiercely at Anders. This is a family affair, it's none of his goddamn business.

He looks at Shaw. "Would you tell the doctor to hurry the fuck up?"

[fortitudosalutis]

Riley feels sick. He strokes Carver’s hair and murmurs to him, trying to keep him calm. But he can feel the fever radiating off of him; it’s getting worse, and Carver’s shaking. He’s never seen Carver like this, never.

“She’s almost here,” Shaw reports softly.

Riley meets Pope’s glare and doesn’t flinch. He holds Carver tight. “I’m here,” he murmurs. “Focus on my voice, it’s okay.”

The door clicks open. A harried looking woman in civilian clothes ducks in.

[aut_nihil]

About goddamn time, Pope thinks, but doesn't say.

He points at Carver. "He's sick."

[fortitudosalutis]

Carver flinches, hiding his face in Riley’s chest again. He’s shaking, his breathing gone ragged, and it worries Riley down in his soul to see Carver showing fear like this, showing fear at all.

The doctor scowls, but moves to the bed. “I can see that. Sick with what?”

Carver won’t look at her. He just clings to Riley and trembles.

“Something’s infected,” Riley murmurs. He has a guess. “Brandon, we need to see.”

[aut_nihil]

"No," Pope snaps. "You can see he's sick, give him antibiotics."

He's not going to let anyone make this worse for Carver. And he's sure as hell not going to strip down either.

"I need them too."

[fortitudosalutis]

Carver flinches. Actually fucking flinches and shakes his head, holding so tight to Riley. He’s scared, he feels utterly fucking terrified, and Riley doesn’t know why. He can guess, but he doesn’t know.

“It doesn’t work like that,” the doctor snaps. “I need to see what I’m working with.”

“No,” Carver hisses.

[aut_nihil]

"You heard him. He said no," Pope says, speaking for himself and Carver both. They're not going to degrade themselves further. Not after all that. "We were hurt--we're sick. Treat us."

[fortitudosalutis]

“Tell him to stop being a bitch,” the doctor snaps, looking nothing but annoyed. “Or hold him still.”

Riley tenses. Fuck, no. “You don’t touch him.”

“Jesus Christ. Do I have to fucking sedate him?” the doctor demands.

[aut_nihil]

"Give him the fucking meds!" Pope snaps. "Or examine me; same thing happened to me, you want that? You want to get neck deep in this mess or do you want to help us?"

[fortitudosalutis]

The doctor exhales sharply. She turns to Pope, scowling. “You show me, then.”

She has no bedside manner.

[aut_nihil]

"No." But he looks at Carver, who is the only other option. And he can't put his boy through this.

"Come with me."

He limps his way to the shitty tiny bathroom. Carver had better damn well appreciate this.

[fortitudosalutis]

Shaw stands, as if to protest. But she holds, bowing her head.

On the bed, Riley feels Carver tremble and start to cry very quietly.

The doctor follows Pope, crossing her arms. She notes the way he limps, though.

[aut_nihil]

Carver is crying. Yeah. He can't make him go through this.

He shuts them into that small space. "This is off the books. You say a goddamn word to anyone and I will make you wish you were never born," he snaps.

[fortitudosalutis]

“I didn’t have to come,” she snaps. “Jesus Christ. Show me or don’t.”

[aut_nihil]

He unfastens his belt, for Carver's sake. He strips down, for Carver. He dares her to say a goddamn thing he doesn't like.

[fortitudosalutis]

The doctor doesn’t say anything. Her expression doesn’t change, more soldier than caretaker. She doesn’t touch Pope but she gives him a long, cool look and then tells him to put his clothes back on. “If either of you have internal damage,” she says finally, “and there’s infection, it can get very bad. I can give you antibiotics but if you’re damaged inside—“

Her jaw works.

“It will be very bad. Do you understand?”

[aut_nihil]

He thinks of the train he pulled, man after man after man. He thinks of the sound Carver made at the end, the one that drove him over the edge and stopped him waiting for their moment and just made him rabid.

"How do you know if there's internal damage?"

[fortitudosalutis]

“I need to look inside,” she replies flatly. “If there’s damage, you’ll both need a hospital. The infection will fuck you up if it doesn’t kill you.”

She exhales.

“The fever could be stress,” she admits. “In that case it’ll probably pass with antibiotics and rest. I have medicine in my kit that’ll help with…whatever’s going on down there.”

[aut_nihil]

Fuck you, he thinks, but doesn't say because none of this is her fault.

"It's probably stress. Give us the drugs. If it doesn't get better you can look at us."